WHAT TO DO WHEN YOU DON’T KNOW WHAT TO DO.

By A. Lane Lavender

Sometimes God’s voice is so loud and clear that His will is obvious. At other times, you listen quietly yet it appears God is silent. In times of silence you look around you for confirmation. You look for signs to see what God is saying, where He is moving, what direction He is leading. You read the Word of God, looking and listening for His voice to leap to you from the pages. You listen to your counselors and friends speak and you look at the circumstances surrounding your situation. Sometimes they all point you in the same direction – the direction God has for you. But at other times all of these counselors and events only prove to confuse you more. What do you do then? What do you do when you are trying so hard to follow God’s direction but still are uncertain what that direction is?

WAIT. Don’t jump off of the ship. Don’t panic. Don’t do anything drastic. Don’t take a “leap of faith.” God has a perfect timing for everything He does. If He has not revealed His plan to you yet, then it is for a purpose. The Scripture is clear that God will direct our steps (Psalm 37:23). The Bible is also clear that God’s timing and His ways are not the same as ours. He sees things from a completely different perspective (Isaiah 55:8). It may even appear to us that what God has promised us will not come to pass, but we only live in the present. God lives in the past, present and future all at the same time. He knows what’s ahead. This means that what we think is hurting us may very well be the thing that is helping us. Think of Joseph, for example. He probably felt abandoned by God in prison, yet God was using the prison to set him up for the palace.

Saul got in trouble when he didn’t wait on Samuel as God had instructed him. This cost him greatly. He responded to his circumstances alone. It appeared that Samuel was not coming, and that they would be surrounded and defeated by their enemies if he did not proceed without Samuel. But Saul was wrong (I Samuel 15).

Abraham and Sarah thought they had waited too long and they took matters into their own hands. This resulted in much pain and strife that is still affecting our world several thousand years later. Who can blame them for wondering what God was doing after waiting fifteen years for His promise to come true? Their circumstances looked impossible with their age, but God had a perfect timing for Isaac to be born. In the end, I’m sure they felt Isaac was worth the wait.

It may seem that you have waited long enough – maybe even too long. Just remember that the important things – the best things – are worth waiting for. Isaac will come. Your dream will come to pass. Provision will come. Ministry will come. That special person will come. That child of promise will come. Wait.

Scriptures: Genesis 16, 21, I Samuel 15, Psalm 27:14,

 OBEY. You may not know what God is calling you to do next, but you do know what He has already called you to. Be faithful in what you know is God’s will. Stay committed and faithful to where and what God has called you to until He shows you otherwise. God’s Word promises blessings to those who are found faithful.

Scriptures: Psalm 31:23, Matthew 25:21-23, I Corinthians 4:2, Isaiah 55:10
 
SURRENDER. Have a heart-to-heart meeting with God and surrender your situation to Him. Tell God that you are willing to give everything – even your very life – to fulfill His plan for you. Admit your anxiety/worry/fear about the uncertainty of your future. Confess your dislike for waiting and your frustration with the inability to move forward. Give all of it to God. He already knows how you feel. It helps not to bottle these things up, but release them to God. Don’t worry, God can handle it, and He will not condemn you, rather, He will comfort you and give you faith.

I find an interesting parallel in Scripture with the story of Abraham’s testing by offering Isaac as a sacrifice to God (Genesis 22). Isaac was the “son of promise.” This child was God’s answer to Abraham’s request and to God’s plan for his life. And now, God wants Abraham to let the dream die? How does this make sense at all? I can’t begin to imagine how confused and frustrated Abraham must have felt. And yet, Abraham surrendered his promise to God and willingly gave back to God what God had promised to him. It was at this point – the point of surrender – which Abraham passed the ultimate test and God exalted him to a higher status that he could ever imagine - for eternity.  Sometimes we have to be willing to let go before the real blessings from God come. Often it is the point of complete surrender that launches us into our true destiny.  This process is excruciatingly emotionally painful! These are the most difficult decisions we make in life. It may mean letting go of a business or even harder, letting go of a child. It may be surrendering your home or giving-in to a surgery. Whatever it is, it has great value to you, and it represents the very future that you thought God had for you. You may be asked by God to surrender it.

I cannot tell you how many times I have seen God turn around a difficult situation supernaturally, only after it seemed the situation was over. Businesses that appeared to be sunk and the owners stopped fighting and just said to God – “If you want my business, then take it – all I have is yours.” It was only then that God supernaturally provided for them, and they found their ram in the thicket.  Surrender is a powerful thing with God. It’s not that God is a sadist, and likes to see people suffer. It’s that He wants to be close to us, and as a jealous God, He will allow difficulty and testing to make sure that we can be with Him, and that we can reach our full potential in Christ.  God will gladly sacrifice short-term discomfort for long-term character.
 
ONE DAY AT A TIME. The children of Israel lived one day at a time in the desert. Each day God supernaturally provided manna and water to sustain them. They were not allowed to store any up for the next day, and they had no idea when the manna would stop. Neither could they see that although they were in a desert, God was leading them to a land of abundance – a land flowing with milk and honey. Each day was a step closer to their blessing, but the only thing they could see was desert. You and I are to live by faith one day at a time (Matthew 6:34). You may be going through a desert in your life where nothing makes sense. The desert is a dry and barren place. It is uncomfortable in the daytime as well as in the nighttime. It seems there is no relief. But if we can wait on God, be faithful each day, and surrender to His plan and trust Him, He will get us to our destiny. In the meantime, He will be a shade for us in the hot sun (a pillar of cloud), heat for us in the night (a pillar of fire), light in our darkness (the pillar of fire was at night), water to our thirst (water from the rock) and manna from on high. And he will supernaturally make the things that we have to endure for the journey (their clothes and shoes never wore out).

When you don’t know what to do, don’t “just do something.” More often than not you will do the wrong thing. Understand that God is up to something and you are simply going to have to wait on Him to move. In the meantime, remain faithful and diligent in your assignment, surrendering everything to God, including your emotions. Trust God one day at a time, understanding that each day is a step closer to your destiny. And remember that God is faithful and the best things are worth waiting for.

                                          HALF WAY?

                                           (Turning the big 50)

The doomsday clock is moving: tick, tick, tick, tick. In a couple of weeks I will celebrate (not really) my fiftieth birthday. That's fifty: 5-0, half way to 100, half a century! It pains me to even pen these words. I'm not dealing with this birthday very well so this blog is an attempt at therapeutic writing. Perhaps I can cleanse my soul of fear and dread about getting older and the reminders of our mortality.

No doubt many of you are reading this post and saying, "Fifty, that's young!" And some of you will remind me that "fifty is the new forty." But the hard statistics cannot be compromised: the average lifespan in the USA is 78 years old. This means I am starting the third of what for most people is three quarters. Truthfully, I don't feel fifty, and I don't thing I look fifty either. It's not the physical body stuff that bothers me. What bothers me is the life stuff. Let me try to put it into words...

I thought that I would be much further down the road of success at this place in my life. For example, when I started my pension fund at age 28 the interest rate was such that I would have half a million dollars in the bank by the time I was fifty: Not happening! The economy in the USA has regressed to the point that I will now have to work full time until the ripe old age of 92! When I received my first ministerial license in the Church of God denomination at age 17, I thought for sure that I would be the General Overseer by now, or at least on the Executive Committee: Not happening! When I started pastoring at age 19, I thought for sure that I would be leading a church of at least three to four thousand by now, not three to four hundred. Truthfully though, I am very grateful to God that He has blessed me far beyond what I deserve, even if it's not what I dreamed.

Looking forward, my plans are different than the first half of my life. The first half was all about reaching goals, but the second half will be about reaching people. The first half was about what I can accomplish, but the second half will be about what I can impart. There is a word that stands out in my thoughts like a strobe light in a dark room: LEGACY. That word keeps flashing brightly. The more attention I give to this word the clearer the message becomes.

One of the greatest gifts to me in this life is the gift of a godly heritage. My father and his father were both pastors and great men of God. They passed on a rich heritage of ministry that gave me years of knowledge and insight as a pastor. I want my sons to have the same godly heritage passed on to them, but I want something more. There is something greater than a heritage and that is a LEGACY.

Legacy is defined by Webster's Dictionary as simply "anything inherited from an ancestor," but a legacy is so much more. A legacy is not something that you just give, it's something that you live. It's not a noun, or even an adjective; legacy is a verb - it's a doing, a being. Legacy is a lifestyle that is imparted into an individual or a group. This impartation is not genetic, like good looks or physical traits. A legacy is learned, not earned. In learning, some things are just caught while other things must be taught. An individual must be very intentional about passing on a legacy. Legacy is intentional mentoring - teaching others important things that bring peace, success, love and fruitfulness. Passing on a legacy is passing on a way of doing things, and leaving a legacy is the best way to continue the fruit of your life far beyond your lifespan. When you leave a legacy others continue to do what you did with your life, but at a greater level. In fact, the more people you mentor the more fruit your life produces. It's kind of like the miracle of compounded interest. The further you go in time the fruit of your life is exponentially multiplied.

Jesus understood legacy. He knew that His time on earth was short, and He would not be able to reach every person on earth with the limitations of being robed in flesh. Accordingly, He passed on a legacy into twelve men He called His disciples. He intentionally spent time and gave life to these twelve men and commissioned them to continue His mission. We call this the "great commission," that is, our co-mission with Christ to save the world. Jesus touched a lot of people in His fewer than fifty years, but through the legacy He passed on to 12 men He continues to reach the billions of people across the globe. That's a legacy, and that's the kind of mission that I want to spend my remaining years establishing.

So here we go. Fifty years of life and experiences that I can spend the rest of my life imparting to others. It could just be that the second half will be much more productive than the first! I will try my best to make it so.

Speak louder, Jesus!

Driving my five-year-old to school this week was quite an experience. For some reason, the "Little General" (our nickname for Joshua) was filled with theological questions. I don't know what it is about morning commutes that sparks creativity toward the Divine, but little Joshua's brain was going into overdrive. This morning was especially humorous. He asked me if the soldiers who killed Jesus went to heaven or hell? When I told him that I didn't know, he asked me how we know if we are going to heaven? I responded that only those who pay tithes go to heaven. Not really. I told him that everyone who knows Jesus goes to heaven, and those who don't know Jesus go to hell. "That's why," I said, "we have to make sure and tell everyone about Jesus." Then he asked me how we get to know Jesus. I answered that we know Jesus by reading the Bible and by praying. "When we pray," I said, "we are talking to Jesus." Joshua then asked, "How does Jesus talk to us?" ("Out of the mouth of babes") I told him that Jesus talks to us on the inside - in our heart and in our head. Then Joshua broke out with a loud voice, "Well I wish Jesus would talk louder because I can't hear Him!"
There are a lot of people who would agree with the Little General. Why doesn't God speak clearly to us? If He wants us to do His will then why is it that sometimes His will is not so clear to us? Certainly all of us have struggled at times with hearing the voice of God. We ask God to tell us what to do about important situations in our life, then we wait to hear His voice - seemingly to no avail. So why the silent treatment from God?
The answer is that God is not silent. He is speaking to us continually. He is not trying to hide His plans for you. The problem is not with God speaking to us, but with us listening to God.
First of all, God has already spoken to us clearly in the Bible. This is why we call the Bible the "Word of God." It is God's revelation of Himself to us and His plan for all of our lives. The Bible is our primary source of hearing from God because it is free of human error or emotions. Most of our answers for most of our situations can be found by searching the Scriptures for what God has already told us about our situation. We just have to take the time to listen (i.e. read).
There are times when we have specific situations where we need answers that may not be easy for us to locate in the Bible. In these times we need to find a quiet place and pray. One of the roles of the Holy Spirit is to speak God's direction and wisdom into our lives. He lives inside us so He is there speaking to us in our conscience and in our hearts and minds all day long. If we never take the time to be still and listen then we will not be familiar with His voice. There are so many voices in the world speaking to us. The more time we spend in prayer and solitude the easier it is to recognize God's voice. Jesus said in John 10:4, that His sheep"follow Him because they know His voice." Do you know His voice?
I know that when I struggle to hear from God on an issue, it is usually because I am too busy to stop and listen to Him. Every time I find a solitary place and seek Him I find that I can hear His voice clearly.
So remember that God is not trying to hide His will from you. It's not a game where He wants you to try to solve the mystery. God is speaking to us all day every day through his Word and by his Spirit. Sometimes we just have to stop and listen.

WORDS

Last night was a very special night at the Lavender house. Last night Joshua learned how to read. It wasn't that he learned to read in one night. We've been working on this for six months! Every day we went over the sounds of letters and how they come together to form words. We memorized sight words and struggled night after night to get him to understand how to read. He didn't get it. Then, last night all the pieces came together for him and he got it!
We've been through this before. This is our third child that we taught how to read. For some reason, our experience didn't make this round any less frustrating. It's hard to understand how the brain works sometimes. Joshua is perhaps the brightest of our children at this age (5 years-old), yet he seemed to take the longest to learn to read. Each child is different and their learning styles so unique. When it comes to learning, one size does not fit all. This is an important revelation that all educators must understand. Anyway, last night, after months of foundation building, the light came on in Joshua's brain and suddenly he could see!
I'm just going to say this up front. There are few things in life as rewarding as watching someone learn how to read. I understand why my wife gives her life to teaching kids. When you see the light come on in their little head it sends electricity surging through your feel-good channels. Joshua was so excited! He went through the house reading words on books, boxes and even the walls! He kept saying, "I can read, Daddy! I can read!" I almost started crying. He couldn't sleep last night. He laid in bed with books open. I could hear him sounding out words in amazement. He finally got it! Now a whole new world is open before him.
The ability to read is the single most important tool in civilization. Illiteracy is followed by poverty, sickness and crime. Every civilization that advanced did so by educating their people. Is it any wonder that Jesus is called THE WORD?

PASTOR LANE'S FACEBOOK RULES

People come to me all the time with critical remarks about Facebook. Most of them are stories of marriages and families that are torn apart from inappropriate liaison's with the opposite sex. The truth is - I LOVE FACEBOOK. I find social networking to be a great tool for ministry and communication with friends, family and church. There are, however, inherent dangers in social media. Accordingly, I would like to propose a list of rules for Facebook that I think all of us would do well to follow. These rules can save us all a lot of headache and heartache. Here we go...
PASTOR LANE'S FACEBOOK RULES
(spiritual etiquette for social media)

1. KEEP IT LEFT-BRAINED. As much as possible, keep your emotions off the web and focus on the facts - just the facts.

2. NO REGRETS. There are two important rules to remember here: 1. Don't say anything you can't take back. 2. You can't take back anything you say. Everything you say in social media can (and will) be used against you (even in a court of law).

3. NO-NAME. Please don't use other peoples names without permission. Better yet, don't use other peoples names at all. And never post individual pictures of other people without their permission.

4. NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS. Don't use Facebook to exploit your "fiends" for money. Sending continual advertisements and promotions for your business or other money-making schemes will soon get you de-friended.

5. I HAVE NO OPINION. Someone once said, "Opinions are like noses: everyone has one and they all small." Leave your opinions to yourself!

6. KEEP IT CLEAN. Stay clear of all sexual innuendos, corrupt communication, slander, and foul (or crude) language. Read Ephesians 4:29

7. PROTECT YOURSELF. Be very selective when putting personal information online, especially your birth date, address, telephone number and email. All of the information you put on your Facebook profile WILL BE STOLEN. Never click on advertising. When you do, you open yourself up to viruses and you will also find your email account flooded with unwanted spam. Never add people you don't know as your Facebook "friend." Think first before you type personal life information. For example, never write things like this: "Leaving for vacation today," or "I'm home all by myself today." If you do, you are inviting thieves and sexual predators to your home. And last bu not least, be very careful about posting children's pictures online. You would be amazed at just how many sick, perverted people are "seeking whom they may devour."

If you will follow these simple guidelines it will make your Facebook experience safer and more enjoyable.

You're welcome!

RAIN

It's raining today. I am coming to understand that this is a daily event in this sub-tropical climate at this time of year. To wake up to a cool rain in the heat of summer is refreshing, to say the least. Rain also slows me down. On a sunny day I spring out of bed ready to tackle the day's obstacles and opportunities. But when I wake up in the dark with the sound of raindrops pattering against the window pane it has a tendency to make me hit the snooze button and roll over for another round of dreams. It sounds pathetic, but the truth is that all of us need a little rain in our lives on a regular basis.

God created the sabbath for man. He even modeled this by ceasing from His labors on the seventh day of creation. He did this for a reason. We need rest to restore brokenness. Our bodies break down from work. Our emotions break down from stress. Our attitudes break down from weariness. Our creativity breaks down from overactivity. Rest restores everything from our body cells to our brain cells.

The opposite of rest is restlessness. Genesis 4:12-14 tells us that restlessness was part of Cain's curse. Whenever we are restless we are operating under the curse. God wants us to be in a state of restfulness (Matthew 11:28-29). He wants us restFULL not restLESS. He is our sabbath rest (Hebrews 4:9-11)! For me, rain says "Stop and relax today - contemplate, allow restoration - chill out - don't take yourself so seriously!"

The other day I was reading in Mark's Gospel where the disciples were overwhelmed with ministry and the demands of people. Jesus said to His chosen disciples, "Come with me by yourselves to a quiet place and get some rest" (Mark 6:31). Jesus understands that we as frail humans have limitations. Jesus became weary Himself several times in His ministry and had to seek reprieve to spend time with His father in restoration. These were battery charging times when He could revive to return and minister some more in the power of the Spirit. If Jesus needed times of respite, what makes us think that we are immune to them?

I used to pray, "Lord, I want to go out in a blaze of glory for You!" I have since discovered that burn out is most unproductive. The "abundant life" - that is, a fruitful life - is a life of balance. The longer I last the more I can do for God. And the sharper I am the more productive my time for Him will be. This means I must learn to slow down and rest on a regular basis. The best way to do this is to spend time every day alone with the Father in prayer and contemplation - quiet time - restful time. If you will give God the first hour of every day, and the first day of every week, He will give you the peace and rest that you need to live in full productivity and abundance.

I don't think I would do well to live in a rainy climate like the Pacific Northwest. I would be in contemplation mode all day long and never get anything done. These early summer days in the Piedmont are perfect. They are filled with sunshine but balanced with a daily thunderstorm that says, "OK, you've worked hard all day, now take a break for a few minutes and restore yourself." So, rather than complain about the lack of sunshine today I'm going to say, "BRING ON THE RAIN!"

Matthew 11:28-29 "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light."

ROUGH PLAY

Last night I tried to wear out the "little general" so he would sleep when I put him to bed. Joshua and I frolicked on the floor and "fighted." He is a typical boy and likes to wrestle and be physical. I was teaching the three-year-old how to box (as in punching someone). I know, some of you think that's terrible, but spare me your sanctimonialism - he's a boy! Joshua needs to know how to protect himself from your kids! Anyway, we were boxing and I accidentally cold-cuffed him and knocked him unconscious. Not really. I did, however, accidentally tap him on his rear side a little harder than play (unintentionally - don't call social services!) when he walked away. You should have seen the look on his face. He wasn't sure if the swat on his butt was a spanking or a play swat. He looked up at me with a tear in his eye to see what my reaction was. I laughed and said, "sorry - here, hit me back." When he saw that I thought it was funny and that I was playing he started to laugh and proceeded to lay into me with a flurry of playful punches. If I would have given him a stern look he would have started to cry, wondering what he did wrong. In that moment I thought about our relationship with God. Sometimes God plays rough.

I'm not sure how this plays into your theology, but I believe that there are times when God hits us with some things that aren't easy Like Joshua, at first we are not sure why God allowed that "hurt" in our lives and we look to Him with bewilderment. It is in those times, however, that God smiles down on us and says, "I'm just teaching you something to make you strong. Don't worry, I won't hurt you. I just want to prepare you for what's coming so you can win every battle." Then He affirms us and we feel security in His strength. This is part of the message of Psalm 94:19. One translation reads, "In the middle of my troubles, you roll me over with rollicking delight." We may not always be able to discern the truth of what God is doing in our lives, but continue to look to Him and you will see His smiling face and know that Daddy will protect you, and everything is going to be alright.